J. D. ‘S STORY
The July sun had just risen as J.
D. lengthened his body from the fetal position and began to rub his eyes. There was the burning sensation in his lids
that he was accustomed to feeling when he slept in the open air. He had fallen asleep the night before on the
grassy bank beside the railroad track that bisected the small Texas town.
The boards of the porch where J.D. took shelter extended over an
embankment behind the building that housed the post office and the town’s only
drug store.. It was not unusual for J.D.
and, occasionally, some of the high school boys to sleep there, especially in
spring and summer.
Almost immediately he tasted the
bitter phlegm edging from his lower throat.
He cleared his throat and wished for a drink of water—or
better yet hot coffee. It would be an
hour before the café would open. Then he brushed the bits of straw and a few red
ants from his trousers. The trousers
were of a synthetic fabric and had developed a variegated sheen over the years.
Gazing
before him, he waited a few moments before he stood up, taking care not to
knock his head against the boards of the back porch. After having gone to Pin Oak Creek on a fishing excursion the day
before, he decided not to walk to his parents’ house five miles south of town.
J.D. never waded the muddy creek with the men who dragged a net through the water. But he enjoyed the camaraderie with the
fishermen. Some of them brought their
shotguns with them in the event they wanted to shoot squirrels. They might even skin a few of the squirrels
if someone had brought a pot and cans of corn and tomatoes for a stew.
At the fishing site the night
before, he drank several cans of beer and ate a bowl of squirrel stew. It was late, close to midnight, when one of the men who drove him to town dropped
him off near the depot. His eyelids felt
heavy, and he went directly to the space under the back porch of the drug
store. He, and occasionally others, had
spent the night there before.
J. D. found his white straw hat and
thrust it on his head. It was still too early for the owner of the service
station where J. D. spent a great deal of his time to open his place of
business.
This was one of the mornings,
common since his return from the war, when he was awakened early by a nightmarish
dream of combat. He often dreamed he was a member of a
battalion like the one in which he served . In the dream he would disembark from
a landing craft at a beach where
Japanese soldiers waited with grenades and other weaponry. The situation in the dream that particular
morning resembled closely the experience he had when his battalion invaded the island of Guam two years before. In the dreams he is a detached observer who sees
one of the men in the unit writhing in agony after he has taken a piece of
shrapnel from a grenade. Another wounded
soldier moves his mouth, as if he might be calling for a medic, but there is no
sound. J. D. sees but not does not hear
the Kamikazis as they dive toward the landing crafts near the shore. Somehow, not hearing any sound made the
sights even more horrible than they had been in actuality two years before..
When J. D.. slept at his parents’ home, he called out in his startling dreams , often
fitfully.. He knew this because
sometimes he came awake suddenly. His
parents must have heard him, but neither of them mentioned the incidents. Neither did his sister.
In these dreams J.D. would occasionally
see the face of Billy Butler, his sixteen-year-old neighbor. Billy was his sister’s classmate at the
school. Strangely, in the dream Billy’s
face looked serene despite the chaos around him on the bomb-ravaged beach.
Over the months since he returned
from the war J. D. had often stopped by the Butlers’ house. After the school day was over, Billy was
usually at home. He was a reader, often
bringing a different novel or biography home each evening from the school
library. Billy was of slight build with
a shock of brown hair, neatly trimmed.
He had hazel eyes with a hint of a Native American slant, a feature he
had inherited from his mother’s side of the family..
J. D. tried hard to suppress his
attraction to Billy. He could not control,
however, the episodes that made up the sequence of dreams he often had. Billy’s face appeared time and time again.
Once a few weeks before when J. D.
borrowed a friend’s car. Billy, Billy’s
younger brother, and J. D.’s sister rode with him to a basketball game at the
high school. At the game Billy performed
as the head cheer leader.
That evening J. D. stood with a group of other men near
one of the two exits in the school’s gymnasium
He found himself gazing at Billy and the other cheerleaders, all girls, rather than at the action on the
court.
During the intermission between the girls’
game and the boys’ game he saw Billy place his megaphone near the foot of the
bleachers and walk toward the exit.
Impulsively , J. D. decided to
follow him. In the parking area cars
were parked pointed every direction. The
area was lighted only by the low-watt bulbs outside the two entrances to the
gym. J. D. noted that Billy went to the
Chevy J. D. had borrowed, opened one of the back doors, and started to step
inside.
J. D.
walked toward the car. Coming within
earshot of Billy, he asked, “Is there somethin’ wrong?”
Apparently
Billy was not aware anyone else had left the gymnasium.
“Nothin’s
wrong,” Billy said. “I’m goin’ back in
now,” he said. He seemed anxious.
J. D.
lighted a cigarette as Billy walked back toward the gymnasium. “I gave the two Butler boys a ride,” he thought. “I wish I could drive Billy home without his
brother.”
When the
game was over, J. D. drove both boys home.
He did not ask Billy why he had left the gym .
That particular morning when J. D.
waited for the service station to open, he was relieved that he had not had the
recurring dreams. To see Billy’s f ace
in the dreams only tormented him. In the
dreams Billy had never been killed, not even injured. But in each of the dreams several teenagers hardly old enough to shave were
among those under fire from the enemy. J.
D. had seen the bodies of many hardly older than Billy damaged by mortars to
the point the individuals could not have been identified except for their dog
tags.
Suddenly J.
D. was jolted out of his indolence by the sound of the first school bus as its
tires rolled across the gravel of the sloping road near where he stood. After the bus passed, J. D. walked in the
direction the bus had come from. Soon he
would be sitting on an up-ended Coca-Cola crate under the portico at the Texaco
station. A day like many others since he
returned home from the South Pacific would begin.
_______________________________
Robert G. Cowser teaches composition part-time and
writes memoirs, fiction, and poetry. Recently, the Chiron Review
published a short memoir, Muscadine Lines published two of his short
stories, and one of his poems, along with a commentary, was translated into
Spanish for Trilce, a Chilean journal.