“Halloween. All hallows
eve. Don’t matter how you say it, it’s a
night for teenagers to act stupid.”
Shale allowed the cruiser to coast through the subdivision.
“Not any
more so than any other night.” Gage
watched a group of kids dressed in their costumes approach another door. “It’s a night for kids to get candy and have
fun.”
“And a
night for mischief and pranks. That’s why I call this night TP patrol.” Shale turned out of the subdivision.
“TP
patrol?” Gage was use to the older deputy’s
cynicism. Twenty years with the
department had a way of stealing one’s compassion.
“Toilet
Paper Patrol. At least we weren’t
assigned to the Happy Hooker’s Bait and Tackle shop.” Shale stopped behind a van unloading eager
ghosts and goblins.
Gage
watched a faded gray truck pass. He
thought for a moment he recognized it as his wife’s. Baxley had not mention going out for the
evening. He was sure she had plans to
stay home and hand out candy to the neighborhood trick-or-treaters.
********
“That was a
deputy car we just passed. You think it
was Gage?” Cissa popped another handful of candy corn in her mouth and chase it
with a swig of diet cola.
“I didn’t
get a look at the tag on the front of the car. I think he’s on the other side
of the county tonight. Either way you
know we can’t buy our TP at the Happy Hooker. The sheriff always has a car
parked there on Halloween.” Baxley
continued down the darken road that led to Vienna.
“I hope the
dollar store is still open. If not,
we’re gonna have to go to Americus. When’s operation pumpkin patrol over?” Cissa checked the clock on the dashboard.
“ Gage said
eleven.” Baxley turned onto the main
highway. “I thought about buying some and storing it at the house. But..”
“Gage would
have known something for sure.
Considering you never have any TP at your house.” Cissa dug into the bottom of the bag for the
remnants of candy. “I always know when
coming to your place to bring my own. Anyway, I didn’t think you’d have the
guts to roll the preacher’s house. Especially
with your momma being the head of the Southern Butterflies. And there’s your grandma getting arrested this year for
stealing Tootsie Harper’s flowers. ”
“I always
have paper at my house. And what momma don’t know won’t cause me grief. That
whole thing with Grandma was a misunderstanding.” Baxley pulled into the parking lot of the
dollar store. “Looks like we made it in
the nic of time.
********
“I think we should park here and walk to the
parsonage.” Baxley pulled the truck into
the First Baptist Church’s parking lot.
“Wait. There’s some car lights coming. Duck down.”
Cissa was already slumping in her seat.
She felt more like a sixteen year old instead of thirty.
“Shit. I think it’s a deputy’s car. I hope they
don’t stop and run the plates.” Baxley
tried to control the giggle that escaped her.
She and Cissa had been best friends long before they were potty trained.
“I think
it’s gone.” Baxley slid out of the
truck. She stuffed her pony tail under
the stocking cat. She’d worn her camouflage hunting pants with a black turtle
neck. Reaching in the front pocket, she
pulled out some of Gage’s hunting war paint and smeared the greasy contents
onto her face.
“What are
you doin’ over there. This isn’t any
time to worry about make-up” Cissa whispered across the bed of the truck.
“Did you
bring any dark clothing with you?” Baxley gently shut the truck door, hoping no
one noticed the interior light. She
scanned the darken street to see if anyone peered through windows.
“You look
like you gonna rob a bank.” Cissa stood holding the shopping bags.
“Reach in
the truck. Gage’s black jacket is behind
the seat. That white shirt of yours is
shining like a full moon.” Baxley
grabbed the bags from Cissa and put them on the ground. “Here smear some of this on your face,
too. I’m gonna open the packages and put
the rolls in my duffle bag. That way no
one can hear the plastic.”
“I wonder
if Gage realizes the criminal mind he married.”
The jacket swallowed Cissa. Long sleeves hung past her finger tips. “My face is gonna be broke out for weeks from
this crap.”
“Stop
whining and come on. I just saw the
light in Reverend McCurkle’s study go out.”
Baxley started to walk toward the parsonage’s front yard. Sounds of an approaching car stopped
her. “Get in the ditch. A car’s coming.”
“But the
grass is wet.” Cissa protested.
“Do you
wanna explain what the church’s Choir Director and Nursery Teacher is doing on
the side of the road?” Baxley pushed
Cissa toward the ditch. “Hurry it’s
about to come around the curve.
“I
swear. I shouldn’t of let you talk me
into this.” A blade of grass tickled
Cissa nose. The car passed in time to
muffle the explosion that Cissa had tried to control.
“You need
to live a little. Where’s the girl that took any dare, could out shoot any boy
in the county, and drank MD 20/20 straight from the bottle?”
“She became
the mother of two girls, branch manager at the local bank, and wife to the
town’s only attorney.” Cissa tried to not see herself through her friend’s
eye. Even she had to admit she found
herself boring and longed for the carefree days of her youth. Maybe that was the reason Baxley’s invitation
was enticing. The girls were with friends.
Mumford was out of town. The only thing she had going for the night was
watching reruns, surfing the internet, and trying to ignore how alone she felt.
“Maybe
tonight is a chance to revisit the ghost of your youth. Come on.
Let’s have some fun.” Baxley
grabbed the duffle bag. She was five
steps ahead of Cissa.
“What made
you decide after all these years to roll someone’s yard on Halloween?” Cissa caught up with Baxley. The two women
stood on the sidewalk and stared at the yard.
A street lamp illuminated one side of the house, casting shadows across
the lawn. They could make out the silhouette of a tall oak and the familiar
sedan parked under it.
“Guess I’m
kinda like you. Tired of being this responsible adult all the time.” Baxley sat the duffle bag on the ground. “You
know my parent’s kept a tight leash on me.
I always hated hearing everyone talk about their Halloween
escapades. Who got hosed for trying to
steal a pumpkin? Which house everyone
TP’d. Then there were the egg fights. I
wanted to be a part of that. So, I guess
tonight is my one night to rebel.”
“You sure
this has nothing to do with you turning thirty in two days?” Cissa grabbed a roll of toilet paper and
launched it in the air. The white roll sailed through the naked branches of the
tree before plummeting back down to earth.
“I think you’re
suppose to do it like this.” Baxley
pulled a long tail from her roll before launching it. Both women watched with
their heads tilted backwards. Up…up…up,
the roll climbed with its long tail streaming behind it before making its
descent.
“Maybe, it
has something to do with the over and under thing. Did you pull the tail from the bottom or the
top?” Cissa studied her roll, trying
both ways.
“I really
don’t think it matters. How is it two
grown women can’t figure out how to roll a tree?” Baxley pulled twice the amount of paper,
creating a longer tail and re-launched.
This time she aimed for the center of the tree. Spindly branches grabbed
at the tail, taking fragments. Little
patches of white hung from their tips.
One branch speared the center of the roll. “I think I just lost my roll.”
“That takes
talent.” Cissa giggle at the sight of
the roll of tissue supported by a tree branch.
“Maybe a squirrel will appreciate it in the morning.”
“Doubt
seriously squirrels care about the comforts of TP during their morning
constitutionals.” Baxley reached into
the duffle bag for another roll. “Maybe,
I should have watched some online videos on how to roll a yard.”
“You
seriously think there are videos for this?”
Cissa wiped her nose that had become numb.
“There’s
videos for everything on the internet.”
Baxley studied the tree and tried to fight the feeling of disappointment
and frustration. She knew the window of time was closing.
“I say we
call it a night. We tried.” Cissa shoved the tissue in the coat’s
pocket. It was one thing to roll the
preacher’s yard but to litter was an unforgiveable sin.
The sound
of a lone acorn falling through the branches and landing on the top of the car
parked beneath the tree brought a new idea to Baxley. Everyone rolls a yard, but what about a
car. “Let’s roll the car.”
“Have you
lost your mind?” Cissa looked at the car
and saw potential.
“Yeah, you
get on one side and I’ll get on the other.
We can toss the roll to each other over the car and then roll it under
on the ground.”
********
The cruiser
slowed past the parsonage and looked at the lone streamer of tissue waving in
the night from the tree and the roll of tissue stuck on a branch. Kids. He thought. Maybe the sound of his car spooked them. Reverend McCurkle’s yard had always been a
coveted target on Halloween.
Tollie turned into the church’s parking lot
and stopped behind the lone vehicle. “Dispatch run MNC4589.” He opened his cruiser’s door and stepped out
to investigate the truck. The long sleek
handle of his trusty flashlight in hand he steadied the beam of light into the
cab of the truck. Empty. He turned his attention to the bed of the
truck. Wads of empty toilet paper wrappers and bags marked with the dollar
store’s logo were strewn across the bed.
“That’s
Baxley’s plates.” Gage looked at his
watch. It was almost midnight. He turned the channel on his mobile radio to the
private channel. “Tollie you out with
Baxley?”
“No, Gage
just the truck. It’s parked in the
church’s lot.” Tollie felt the hood of
the truck. “It’s been here a while the hood is cold.”
“She must
of’v had something to do at the church tonight.” Gage searched his memory trying to think if
Baxley had mention any meeting at the church or with that women’s group she
went to.
“No one
else is around.” Tollie pulled on the
door handle. “Both doors are
locked. Everything looks fine. I’m going back to main channel.”
“Thanks.
Tollie.”
*******
“Hit the
ground. That’s a sheriff’s car
coming.” Baxley was already pressing her
body close to the ground and next to the car.
“I think it
pulled into the parking lot at the church.”
Cissa was already imagining the phone call to her husband. “Mumford,
I’m in jail. Can you come and get me.”
Her husband could make her feel like a child at times and tolerated her
friendship with Baxley.
“Crap, he’s
gonna run my plates.” Baxley knew her
gig was up and that her husband would soon know she was not at home.
“What if he
sees all the empty toilet paper wrappers?
You forgot to put them in the truck.”
Cissa’ tried to ignore the ache in her left knee from hitting the
pavement so hard.
“I heard a
door shut. Can you crawl to the front of
the car?” Baxley anticipated the deputy
to make another pass, slower than the last one.
“Yes, why?”
“Because
he’s coming this way and is shinning his spot light.” Baxley’s instincts were on target.
Seconds
ticked by like hours. Both women watched
the beacon on the side of the patrol car cast its light on the front of the
parsonage, the shrubs, through the back windshield of the car that provided
them refuge, and finally on the lone streamer of paper still captured in the
tree accompanies with a single roll of paper.
Neither
woman moved. The sound of the fading
engine of the patrol car had long passed. Deep in the pit of Baxley’s soul a giggle
began to form. She tried to stifle
it. But, it refused to be silenced. Like a lone bubble making its way to the
surface, a single giggle escaped.
“It’s not
funny.” Cissa tried to sound stern in her
admonishment.
Baxley released
another giggle.
“Do you
know how close we just came to getting arrested?” Cissa put her hand over her mouth to keep
Baxley from seeing the grin.
Baxley
unable to control the episodic giggles became racked with hysterical
laughter. Tears formed and spilled. “We are pitiful. Two grown women that can’t even roll a yard.”
Cissa
infected with the contagious laughter.
“At least we speared one roll on a tree branch.”
“I guess
that will have to be our accomplishment.”
Baxley wiped her eyes. “Can you imagine the scuttle that is going to
cause? Everyone will wonder how a roll
of toilet paper got stuck in the tree.”
“Are you
quitting? Because I’ve never know you to
quit.” Cissa grabbed her roll of paper.
“You were
right earlier. We’re adults. You’re the choir director. A branch manager at the
bank. Mumford already has a strong dislike for me.” Baxley stood.
“I’m a deputy’s wife. My mom is
the president of the SB’s. We need to
quit while we still have our dignity.”
Cissa
stared at Baxley. Everything her best
friend said was correct. They were
responsible, mature adult. Other
parents’ trusted them with their children.
Standing here in that moment was something no one would expect from
either of them. Cissa pulled paper from
the roll until is pooled on the ground around her feet. She reared back with the roll in her hand and
launched it over the top of the car.
“What are
you doing?”
“Rolling
the preacher’s car.” Cissa was already
walking to the rear of the car to retrieve the roll. “You gonna catch it when I roll it to you
from under the car?”
Baxley
smiled and gave the roll in her hand a gentle squeeze. “Yeah, but catch mine first.”
*******
“Pinky swear, we go to our graves never
telling anyone about tonight.” Cissa
held up her pinky.
Baxley put
the truck in park and crooked her pinky around Cissa. “Promise.
Best of friends through thick and thin.”
“So you
planning on bringing your squash casserole to the Sunday night social.” Cissa removed Gage’s coat and reached for her
purse.
“Yep. Am I picking you up Thursday for the SB’s
meeting?”
“Yeah. You better get if you gonna beat Gage
home.” Cissa opened the truck door. “And
start thinking of why this truck was at the church tonight.”
“We had a
meeting with the Holy Ghost.” Baxley
laughed.
*******
Gage cut through town and drove past the
church. Baxley’s truck was gone. He almost ran off the road when he spotted
Reverend McCurkle’s car. It sat looking
like a mummy. Not an inch of the car was uncovered by toilet
paper. On top was huge white bow and
trails of toilet paper ribbons draping off all sides. The streamer of paper in
the tree caught his attention. Was that a roll of toilet paper stuck on a branch?
Shale was
right. Halloween was a night for teenagers to act stupid. He reached for his
radio and went to private channel. “Tollie, you up?”
“Yeah,
Gage.”
“When’s the
last time you check Reverend McCurkle’s house?”
“Right
before I ended my shift.”
“You still
out?”
“Yeah,
why?”
“You might
want to check it again. Looks like some
kids got his car. Damn thing looks like
a mummy. They even put a bow on top of
it.”
“Be there
in a less than five.” Tollie’s five
minutes turned into two. He pulled his
cruiser up next to Gage’s and stared at the scene before him. “I’m never gonna
live this down.”
“Yep. And I’ve got pictures to show everyone. Already posted them on my Facebook page. Look, it already got forty-three likes and
there’s some comment about you.”
“I forsee a
lot of barking dog calls in your future.”
Gage
studied the tree. “Wonder what made them
decide not to roll the tree.”
“Who can
tell the reasoning of teenagers?” Tollie
shook his head. “Guess I better clean it
up before the Reverend sees it in the morning.”
“I’ll help.” Gage felt the hard object before hearing the
crunch. At first he’d thought it was an
acorn. In the low lighting he caught a
glimmer. Reaching down, Gage picked up
the mangled earring next to the front driver’s side tire. He studied it for a moment and then placed it
in his pants pocket.
*******
Gage parked his patrol car in its
usual spot next to Baxley’s truck and gathered some trash from the passenger
side. He touched the hood of the truck
and was surprised to feel it semi-warm.
A glance in the back of the truck did not reveal anything to confirm his
suspicions.
Gage opened the garbage can to toss
the handful of trash but studied the contents.
There were at least twenty empty toilet paper rolls on top of the
mountain of plastic wrappers and shopping bags.
He tossed his trash and closed the lid.
Baxley had some explaining to do.
The interior of the house was quiet
and peaceful. Everything was clean and
in its place. He walked into the bedroom
and studied his wife’s sleeping form.
She always slept on her right side.
Percy, her tabby, lifted his head, curled his tongue with a wide yawn,
exposing long white canines, before squinting his eyes at Gage.
Gage stepped over to Baxley’s side
of the bead and gently scratched the cat between the ears. He leaned over and brushed wayward strands
from Baxley’s face. A faint trace of
black grease was in the hairline around her ear. The ear that had been home to the earring in
his pocket. He’d recognized it from the
pair he’d given her for Christmas.
Baxley stirred and looked up at
Gage. “You’re home. How was your night?”
“Usual. You know how Halloween is. Teenagers and their pranks. You do anything exciting?”
“No. Just hung out.”
“At the church?”
“Cissa and I went for a
meeting.” Baxley had practice her
response to Gage’s inquisitiveness.
“Did ya’ll have a good one?”
“One what?”
“Meeting.”
“ Yeah. It was inspirational.” Baxley let out a fake yawn. “You coming to
bed?”
“In a few.” Gage kissed Baxley on the forehead. “Go back
to sleep. See you in the morning.”
Baxley thought about the morning. She’d
resume being the dependable and responsible adult everyone expected of
her. In two days, she would bid farewell
to her twenties and welcome a new decade of her life. But, for a few liberating hours on the night
of all hollow’s eve, she and her best friend revisited the ghosts of their
youth.